Hermes is a bastard! Or, “Why it’s okay to screw up sometimes”.

Last night went terribly.

Sitting at my altar, I:
-Forgot to bring over the incense I was going to use
-Could not, for the life of me, find it
-Burned myself
-Burned myself again
-Scared myself when my knife fell and made a loud noise
-Could not open the oil bottle for libation
– And, as always, barley ended up everywhere on the floor.

When I left I could hear what I’m pretty sure was Hermes having a laugh at me.

Hermes isn’t a bad guy, and maybe he was the one who moved my incense on me when I wasn’t looking. He’s just occasionally silly and likes to mess with people. In terms of Dungeons and Dragons, he’s pretty much Chaotic Good alignment.

I am glad it seems most pagan gods have a sense of humor, and will even occasionally accept awkward, well-meant offerings. Someone on the website mentioned offering Lily-of-the-Valley incense to Poseidon, and thinks it went something like this:
Child: “Mommy I painted you this!” (paint everywhere)
Mother:  “Oh… what a lovely bird! Let’s go get you cleaned up.”
Child: “Mommy, it’s a lion!” ):
Mother: “… let me tack it on the fridge.”
Child: 😀

They usually accept things from those who truly mean it as an offering, so long as it’s not something explicitly stated as things they don’t like, such as olive oil for Poseidon (part of the founding myth of Athens!) or, say, having a Heracles symbol on an altar specifically for Pan (Pan even tried to spread rumors Heracles was a transvestite!) Pan was also a bit of Greek myths’ butt monkey.

They also understand if you are limited because you are “in the closet” with your family or do not have a lot of funding coming in to make fantastically gorgeous altars.

So they’ll overlook the general screw ups of everyday life. Just mean well. 🙂

<3, Lily.


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